After some abusive confrontations, the victim’s mind-set is “it’s not paranoia if they’re really out to get you.”.
First fictional scenario – Sammy, built like a linebacker on steroids, class bully with unaddressed mother issues, walks the path of the controller by way of force…..he’s keen on always throwing the first punch in any fight. To let off steam and to excite, his hands roam over occasional female bodies in the congested halls between classes. Mirena catches his eye, or rather her ass does, and he’s thrilled to have found his next target. Friday as classes end and the hall is almost empty, Sammy approaches Mirena quickly from behind…..Oh, he really likes to approach from behind, a sneak-up. With his hand sliding quick as a snake from her shoulder to grip her neck, for the non-observant passer-by, it’ll look like a caress. But actually by applying pressure, it’s his way of immobilizing her as his other hand roams from her back, over her curves. Mirena knows Sammy and his reputation as a brute and a groper, she’s afraid, and starts to struggle, saying “please, please stop.” Sammy likes the fear, wants more and retaliates by tightening his fingers on her neck, enjoying he’ll mark her with his bruises. She quits struggling as his hands continue to roam. When she sees a few other people walking out, he tightens his grip on her neck again reminding her not to cry out for help or he’ll really hurt her. Sammy’s a thrill seeker and pats himself on the back for finding another victim afraid to yell for help. He whispers in her ear, that soon enough he’ll have her on her knees, and then walks away. Mirena, crying, terrified, and not knowing what to do, makes it home and decides if she keeps quiet, doesn’t cause problems, if she just tries to avoid him in the future, maybe he’ll leave her alone. But that won’t be the case, he’s itching for the next time with Mirena and hopes to capture some submission and nudity on video to put on line.
Sammy’s a multi-faceted bully, controller, to-be-rapist, and budding perv-cyber-bully. How many people, as of now, have not spoken up and exposed Sammy? The pure and simple truth is Mirena needs to speak up.
Second fictional Scenario – Rob’s new in this high school, and has geek written all over him. He’s smart enough to create a future that will thrive with prosperity and creativity. Factor in his kindness, he’s a good guy. He’s also become a target from a couple of students, students not doing well or even average in their classes. The bullying started with verbal abuse and escalated into physical attacks. The first afternoon that Rob goes home with a split lip and a black eye forming, he’s glad his parents aren’t there, feeling too embarrassed and humiliated to explain. He may say nothing about the attack, but realizes quickly it probably won’t stop on it’s own. The second time he comes home with a bruised jaw, he starts talking…. to his parents, to his teacher and guidance counselor, and to the principle.
Written by Barbara Jetton, 6/2013.
COMING NEXT – 2 more scenarios, and thoughts on a bully’s motives, his or her tools, chosen victims, and what professionals say victims should do.